What it's Really like to Not have Friends in College

*Disclaimer I’m being 100% honest I’m this post. All opinions and thoughts are my own*

Wanna know what it’s like to not have girlfriends or at least a solid, good group of friends? Well, it sucks.  If I told my high school self that at this moment of my college career that I wouldn’t have friends, I without a doubt wouldn’t believe you...or myself(?). I’m a college junior and I don’t have friends. It’s not that I don’t want them-trust me I do- it’s just that I’m not having that- OMG you’ll meet your best friend/bridesmaids in college experience. It’s been so hard. And I’m not here to get pity readers or whatever I just think and know that there are people like me out there.

First things first I'm a transfer student so right off the bat I don’t have the -been here since the beginning type of relationship with most people at my university. And I do relate to those who’ve transferred so I’m not totally alone.

So, what’s it’s like not having a solids group of friends in college? It sucks because I’m always the odd girl walking into the library alone looking for a table when everyone else is in groups and yeah I know they don’t care for me but every time I walk in there I feel weird being all alone. It’s the feeling that when I’m sitting alone at a table I feel like a loner when other groups walk in a sit at the same table I’m at because I’m just taking up one space while there aren’t any more tables available. I’m the one whose “checking my texts” when larger groups of people are near me and I'm the obvious outcast.

Again on transferring, Trust me, I knew that I’d be alone once I transferred from junior college to university but I kinda had this vision that I would fit right in with the other students in my major but man I was just dreaming big. In fact my very first day at university was great and I did meet some awesome girls but they aren’t what I wanted and in fact, I don’t think and still think that I’m not what they wanted. My first “real” college class required that the students be split into groups.  This girl sat next to me on the first day so we decided to group together. And then two other girls were added into our group and ever since then we’ve been “friends”. Friends is in quotation marks because what do we really know about each other? I know nothing about these girls except for the obvious fact that we all have the same major. Right off the bat, I knew that I was kinda the odd one out. And trust me this isn't a post to diss them, I would never do that to anyone. But I could just feel that I wasn't connecting to them and that was fine. Not everyone you meet will automatically become your best friend... I just thought that there was some hope in it.

So, fast forward to this year and I'm still "friendless" and that's okay. There are days that I wish I had friends to go out and see the new art exhibit with or just simply had fun little coffee dates. I wish I had friends to go to free football games with. I wish I had friends to tell about my horrible days at work and how I want to quit so bad but I'm scared to. I wish I had friends to talk about life stuff with but instead, I hold all of these thoughts and silly wishes inside. My list can go on and on but I'll stop there for now.

But not having friends is all right. It means that I get to take in my college experience and focus on me, myself and I which is important.  It's also taught me to that it's okay to be alone. College is such a fun time and you should really experience it with others but not belonging to a group makes you realize that your strong and you are able to do this all by yourself.

There's a ton more that I can say but for now, I think I've gotten my word out about friendships in college. And I know that I'm not the only one going through this. So, for now, I hope y'all enjoyed and truly understood where I'm coming from with this post.

2 comments

  1. It can be so difficult to make new friends! If you need someone to talk about all the life stuff with, reach out, I'd love to chat!
    Rebecca
    www.thebloomly.com

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